Happy 4th Birthday Elysha!

Our little Elysha is turning four this weekend! She has been waiting for this day for a very long time. When we went to Legoland in May, she was barred from a ride because she wasn't four years old. She was so devastated and Chang was peeved. He wanted to go to Legoland on her 4th birthday to make it up to her. She keeps saying that now she can ride the horsey ride at Legoland. Who knew that four years old would be such a big milestone?

We threw her a little party this year. Her first girlie party. Silvermist (the water fairy from the new Tinkerbell movie) was invited per Elysha's request. Last year's party was also in our backyard and it was the hottest day of the year. It was sweltering heat. This year it sprinkled on and off all throughout the party--not hard enough to get anyone wet, thank goodness. Plus the weather wasn't too cold so it all worked out.

In this past year, she started preschool, learned to socialize with other kids on a much larger scale and not be so dependent on Joey's company, learned her alphabet and phonics and numbers, learned to read and learned to count and add. Something changed this past year for her mentally too--it's hard to explain. Elysha was speaking in full sentences by the time she was 18 months. She was amazing. But I feel like this past year, she really understands what she is saying, is able to explain herself better, and is no longer just parroting Joey. She is really becoming her own person and I like it. She is really good at sharing her stuff and is genuinely happy for other people. She has a really big heart. We are so proud of her in so many ways and I am excited to see what this next school year is going to be like for her, being one of the older kids. She hasn't really been in this situation so I would like to see her take on a more leadership role. I feel like she is compassionate and very empathetic with others, which probably comes with the territory of being a middle child--a good plus!

When we were at my mom's house a few months ago, my mom was lying down in bed, reading. Elysha came into her room and lie down next to my mom. Then she got up and grabbed some snacks and fed my mom and herself while lying together. How sweet, right?

We love you Elysha! Thank you for being you, my considerate, compassionate, puzzle-loving, playdoh-loving, and karaoke-loving sweetheart.

Sam trying to make his moves on Silvermist.

Birth order

Elysha started school with Joey this past week which has been so great for me. I worked out four times this week (yup, everyday I went to the gym. I have exercised more this week than I did all last year). Even though I am eating ice cream cake while I am writing this, I really have been so good about eating too--I was totally craving McDonalds. While I used to indulge in it at least once a week, I can't remember the last time I ate those perfect fries. Oops, this topic is birth order and I am digressing...

Anyhow, Elysha started school with Joey and now, the two of them spend every waking moment together. In addition to school, they have been doing swim classes and they just started two art classes this week. While they enjoy all these activities, I am sensing that they need their space. Why did I entitle this blog "Birth Order?" Because I am noticing the negative aspects of being first born, second born, etc.

Joey--when Elysha was younger, we made Joey yield to Elysha all the time. We also wanted her to feel a sense of responsibility towards her siblings. But I think I am going about it the wrong way--instead of liability, I think we need to develop a sense of compassion in Joey instead. As I was putting the girls down to sleep tonight, I told Joey how proud I was of her for taking care of Elysha at school. Joey started to cry and said that Elysha always wants to play with her so she hasn't been able to play with her friends. I felt so bad for her because I know that Joey takes her role as the oldest seriously. Another realization I had was to make Joey see the cool things about being the oldest--first to get her ears pierced, first to get to wear heels--these are the things that Joey cannot wait to do.

Elysha--now that she and Joey are always together, she has to hear people praise Joey all the time. Joey is so keen on being able to swim so she is the shining star in her class (it doesn't hurt that she's the oldest too). Also, Joey's fine motor skills developed at an early age so she has been able to hold a pencil correctly and cut with scissors since she was barely three. Elysha still has shown no interest in writing her name (Joey was able to write her name when she was two) or in drawing objects. So she just did her own thing in art class. I am sure that she can sense when people are mock praising her. When she was at JAG for the transition school and gymnastic classes, she was the little star. She had a close relationship with the teacher and was excelling in the class. And now, she is always in Joey's shadow. I want to provide her opportunities to be her own person.

Sam--okay, so he's not suffering too much but I am forcing him into the child care at the Y. He lasted 5 minutes the first day and 2 minutes the second day. Even though he was bawling, I just settled him down and threw him back in because I was determined to run my mile. I would have never have done that with either of the girls. But I just have less sympathy for Sam because my desire to get back into shape is stronger. Besides, I know that he'll live. So he is sucking on their sticky, gross, communal toys, but that's okay, because I am losing my weight. Wow, I sound self-absorbed. But after three kids, there has to be some modicum of selfishness, otherwise, I would go insane.

Sibling love

I think the kids are going to have very unique relationships with one another. Elysha is starting to show jealousy with Sam. Joey was so young when Elysha was born that she just didn't know any better. But even if she was older, I think she would have behaved the same way. Elysha loves Sam so much but I think she is starting to be less understanding when I can't hold her because I am holding Sam. She's acting out a lot these days and I forget that it can be related to Sam because Joey didn't exhibit any odd behavior after Elysha was home. In any case, I think Elysha and Sam are going to be really close because they are home together now. Joey is going to take care of Sam because she is such a nurturer. And Joey and Elysha are going to love each other and fight a lot with each other since they are so close in age.

Elysha started school!

On Monday, my second baby started school. She is only attending twice a week at a school different from Joey's. On those days, I spend about two hours in the car with all the pick up and drop offs and I get about 2.5 hours of being with just Sam. On Monday, I tried to do a Mommy and Me yoga DVD but he got fussy a quarter into it. So after nursing him, he passed out and I had to wake him up 1.5 hours later to go get Elysha. It was amazing, being home and not having someone shadow me constantly. I was so productive. I finished my DVD (first time working out since Elysha was born--it's not a typo--I haven't worked out since Elysha was born--once a week pilates for about two months and then I got rock-hard abs back. ha ha, more like I lost enough weight to get back into my clothes and gave up on the muffin top), made a few work phone calls and worked on Elysha's baby book.

The teacher who teaches Elysha also taught Joey briefly and she can't get over how different they are in personality. Joey is slow to warm up and gets shy easily. Elysha jumps right in and doesn't look back. The first day I dropped Elysha off, she went right in with no problems and barely looked at me as I walked away. Joey cried many mornings and I had to do the stoic mom act. Drop her off and walk away without emotion. There are times these days, that she still holds my hand and doesn't want me to go.

Elysha is such a strong girl. She knows what she wants and she doesn't yield. Chang and I are having a hard time with her but there is a part of me that is okay with it. This girl will not be pushed around because she will just push back. She often gets Joey in trouble and is unapologetic. She is either going to be a future psychopath or a future president. I'm grateful that she is this way as the middle child. She won't get lost in the shuffle and will make damn sure that her voice is heard.

Joey is reading!

Well, sort of. At her school, if a student is ready, s/he is allowed to take home a book. I think they practice reading the book with a teacher and then they take home the same book and read it to their parents. Joey has been learning phonics at school and has been showing some interest in reading. So I got her some sight reading books. Instead of the word, there will be a picture in place of it. She was doing a good job with those.

I am proud of her and really love the school because they really encourage a love for learning. They had an open house the other day where the students could show their parents what they were learning in school. Montessori uses these learning trays or activity carpets where a student chooses what s/he wants to do on her own. And every activity something is learned--whether it be fine motor skills, counting, phonics, drawing, etc. Joey wanted to keep doing activities during the open house so she clearly has a great time. Without any prodding from me, she is learning to read!

Elysha is learning the alphabet because of all the PBS she watches! I had no idea she knew the alphabet but as she was watching Superwhy about 2 months ago, she was shouting out the letters. I guess younger siblings almost seem to learn things by osmosis.

Sam is three months!

Sam at Three Months!

I feel like my baby was just born yesterday but he is already three months old. How did time pass so quickly? Sam is still in bed with me and Chang has been sleeping in the nursery. I'm so hesitant to move him into the crib for two reasons: a) it's easier since he still wakes up at night and I want to just nurse him back to sleep; b) he's so deliciously adorable that I want to hold onto this baby stage as long as possible. I think there is something in me that wants to delay the growth of my baby because he is my last and that thought makes me sad. Don't get me wrong...I have no desire to have another baby (well, almost no desire, but I just can't go through all this again). But to know that this is truly it? I am coddling Sam more than any other baby. With Joey, I wanted to do things the "right"way. With Elysha, I was just too exhausted to have any method to my madness. But with Sam, he'll probably be in bed with me until he's 100 years old.

So my little linebacker Sam--he is 17 pounds at 3 months! He is 95% in weight. I haven't measured his height yet. He smiles all the time and laughs a lot too. Just perfect.

Sam--all too aware that he has taken the lead in his mama's affections.

Inaugural Post

People have been asking for photos. Blogging technology has made it sleep deprivation proof. I haven't been good about journaling and I feel like I have forgotten so many things already about their baby years--so this will be good for prosperity. Besides, I am so in love with my baby...and the girls--they have been so amazingly cute and "thorn in my flesh" difficult!

Joey--she is so beautiful and smart. I look at her and I can't believe that she is already 4 years old. She's the biggest girlie girl ever. She loves the learn and be independent. She is so sweet and is a really good big sister to both Elysha and Sam.

Elysha--she is so cute! She's got such big eyes and she is so mischievous. If there is trouble lurking around, Elysha will find it and become its partner in crime. She is easy going 95% of the time--but boy, that 5%! She loves little Sam and wants to do the same thing her big sister.

Sam--he is my angel baby. He sleeps all the time, smiles and laughs when he is awake, and he is just so sweet. I am really loving this baby stage again. Three is REALLY hard and I complain all the time--but I wouldn't change anything.

Oh yeah...Chang and I are doing well too. =) He is a really wonderful husband, father, and best of all, takes care of the girls in the morning so I can sleep in with Sam.