Encouragement for the Jobless

I'm feeling very blessed these days. I know that we don't know what tomorrow brings but what I have learned over the years is that God is good and His mercies endure forever.

I've already shared almost dying and almost losing Sam (in utero). But as I hear about friends left and right losing their jobs, I hope to encourage people with our story...

Both Chang and I experienced job losses. For me, I was working at a dot bomb--high flying Commerce One. The company literally imploded and I was the first to be cut on my team. My boss' reasoning was LIFO (last in, first out). I accepted my fate and severance package, but thought the timing kind of sucked. Chang and I just got engaged six weeks before so I needed to find a job quickly in order to help pay for the wedding.

However, I finally had the time to think about the wedding and my female ego got the best of me. I learned calligraphy and hand addressed our invitations and place cards. I handmade a lot of stuff for the gift table, place settings, and bridal party gifts. I created tons of spreadsheets (always fun for me!). It was a blessing in disguise because by the time our wedding rolled around, I felt very prepared and was able to just enjoy the day (despite running out of gas on the way to the salon--but that is a story for another day).

And just as my severance ran dry, I got a new job. I feel that God provided for me a once in a lifetime chance to enjoy a once in a lifetime event. I had so much fun prepping for my wedding that I helped coordinate a couple friends' weddings afterwards and even considered going into it professionally.

Chang was miserable at his old firm up in the bay area. Almost daily he had run-ins with the head of his department. At first, I didn't understand how dire the situation was. But then the boss sent Chang a nasty email the day we left on our honeymoon about how disappointed he was in Chang. It made me disgusted. Fed up, Chang quietly interviewed at a firm in LA but turned down the offer because neither of us really wanted to move down to LA at that point. He decided to keep working at his firm and tried to change his attitude.

Then at his year end review in 2003, the firm decided to let him go. I was so upset because I was 36 weeks pregnant with Joey at the time! How could they do that to us, I thought! Well, it turned out to be a blessing. Chang and I were able to enjoy the first four months of our first baby's life together at home. We had so much fun and just soaked in the wonder and awe of having a baby. Then Chang got in touch with the LA firm again and they offered him the job again. So within 6 weeks time, we sold our condo and moved down to LA. And every day, Chang comes home so happy with his "new" firm and his co-workers. He no longer comes home grumpy and griping.

So both experiences didn't make sense at the time, but as we went through the days of being laid-off, it turned out to be a wonderful time to enjoy what was going on in our lives.

99 Things to Do in LA with your Kids

Okay, I worked way too hard and got paid way too little for me to not duplicate this post.

So if you live in LA, check out the list.
If you don't live in LA but plan on visiting with your little in the near future, check out the list.
If you don't live in LA and have no plans on visiting anytime soon and have no kids, check out the list (just humor me please).
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We are very fortunate that here in LA, there are probably a gabazillion things to do (my daughters are into making up numbers to one up each other and it is rubbing off on me). There will never be a shortage of activities thanks to beautiful weather year-round, great playgrounds, innovative businesses that cater to kids, and awesome nature just a few steps or short car drive away. Of course we are paying an enormously high cost of living to be here, but the perks make up for it, right? Believe it or not, I really had to limit myself to 99. Maybe one day, I will post 999 things to do...you know...when I have all this extra time on my hands.

I included hyperlinks for each activity/location for addresses, directions, and more information.

Here are just 99 things to do, in no particular order, broken down by categories:

Neighborhood Parks--These are my kids' favorites and each are unique in their own way. (9)
Douglas Park in Santa Monica
Aidan's Place in West LA
Holmby Park in Westwood
Virginia Avenue Park in Santa Monica
Burton Chace Park in Marina Del Rey
Griffith Park in Los Feliz
Veteran's Park in Culver City
Roxbury Park in Beverly Hills
Stoner Park Pool in West LA

Hiking Trails--We've hiked most of these trails with the kids, some with a stroller. (6)
Solstice Canyon in Malibu
Franklin Canyon Park in Beverly Hills
Point Dume in Malibu
Temescal Canyon Gateway Park in Pacific Palisades
Coldwater Canyon Park in Beverly Hills
Will Rogers State Park in Pacific Palisades

Amusement Parks--Do I need to say more? (6)
Disneyland in Anaheim
Knotts Berry Farm in Buena Park
Adventure City in Anaheim
Knott's Soak City in Buena Park
Universal Studios in Universal City
Six Flags Magic Mountain in Valencia

Indoor Play Area--These are our favorites and all of them can be rented out for birthday parties. (6)
Under the Sea (many locations)
Giggles n Hugs in West LA
Treehouse Social Club in Los Angeles (Robertson Blvd)
Adventure Plex in Manhattan Beach
Child's Play in Westwood
Play in Mid-Wilshire
Naya's Garden in Silverlake

Beaches--I included the beaches that were more kid-friendly (bathrooms, nearby food vendors in the summer). (10)
Santa Monica Beach
Malibu Lagoon State Beach
Zuma Beach in Malibu
Venice Beach
Leo Carillo State Beach in Malibu (tidepools)
Redondo Beach
Seaside Lagoon in Redondo Beach
Paradise Beach in Malibu
Jalama Beach in Lompoc (beach camping)
Marina "Mother's" Beach in Marina Del Rey

Mountain Resorts--Most of these resorts have recreational activities all year long. (7)
Mt Baldy
Mt High
Lake Arrowhead
Big Bear Lake
El Capitan Canyon
Mammoth Mountain
Yosemite National Park

Theatres--El Capitan and Santa Monica Playhouse are geared more for children. The others occasionally have programs that preschoolers would be interested in. Check the schedule for upcoming shows. (5)
El Capitan Theatre in Hollywood
Santa Monica Playhouse in Santa Monica
Mark Taper Forum in Downtown LA
Pantages Theatre in Hollywood
Walt Disney Concert Hall in Downtown LA

Sports Teams--My husband and I are big sports fan. We've taken the kids to Dodgers games a couple times and they had a great time. (5)
LA Galaxy at Home Depot Center in Carson
Los Angeles Dodgers at Dodgers Stadium in LA
Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim at Angel Stadium in Anaheim
Los Angeles Lakers at Staples Center in Downtown LA
Los Angeles Clippers at Staples Center in Downtown LA

Gardens--All of these gardens are a bit of a drive but absolutely worth it. (3)
The Huntington in San Marino
Descanso Gardens in La Canada Flintridge
LA County Arboretum and Botanic Garden in Arcardia

Aquariums--Big and small, all lots of fun! (3)
Santa Monica Pier Aquarium
Aquarium of the Pacific in Long Beach
Cabrillo Marine Aquarium in San Pedro

Local Attractions--An array of local venues that the kids are sure to love. (11)
The Grove in Mid-Wilshire
Santa Monica Airport
Los Angeles Zoo
Santa Monica Pier/Carousel/Paradise Park
3rd Street Promenade in Santa Monica
Griffith Park--Travel town
Star Eco in Culver City
Discovery Science Center in Santa Ana
Culver Ice Arena in Culver City

Museums--All of these museums are kid-friendly and even have programs/exhibits specifically for kids! (11)
Getty Center in Bel Air
LA County Museum of Art in Mid-Wilshire
Museum of Contemporary Art in Downtown LA
Autry National Center of the American West (across from the LA Zoo)
Zimmer Children's Museum in Mid-Wilshire
Page Museum at La Brea Tar Pits in Mid-Wilshire
Kidspace Children's Museum in Pasadena
Skirball Cultural Center in Bel Air
Natural History Museum of Los Angeles County near USC
California Science Center near USC
Petersen Automotive Museum in Mid-Wilshire

Historic LA--Make it a really fun day trip and take the Metro! You can take a bus to a station, or drive into Koreatown and park at the Denny's off Western. (6)
Olvera Street
Chinatown
Union Station
Grauman's Chinese Theater
Venice Canals
Cathedral of our Lady of the Angels


Farmer's Markets--These are my favorites. We have a ton in the LA area but these farmer's markets really stand out. (5)
Culver City (Main Street, Tuesdays, 3 pm to 7 pm)
Brentwood (Gretna Green Way, Sundays, 9 am to 2 pm)
Santa Monica (three locations, four days, check schedule)
The Original Farmer's Market at Third Street and Fairfax (adjacent to the Grove, everyday, all day)
Larchmont Village (Larchmont Blvd, Sundays, 10 am to 2 pm)

Farms--Most of these farms have seasonal activities year round. (3)
Underwood Family Farms in Moorpark
Willowbrook Apple Farm in Oak Glen
Greenspot Farms in Mentone

Weekend Excursions--Just an hour or two away by car, a great family vacation awaits! (3)
San Diego

Legoland/Sea Life Park Aquarium
Sea World
San Diego Zoo/Wild Animal Park

Santa Barbara

Consider taking Amtrak Train
Santa Barbara Zoo
Solvang

Catalina Island

Our Day in the Snow

We went on the Palm Springs Arial Tram a couple of weeks ago to play in the snow. It was a perfect day because the snow was fresh and it wasn't absolutely freezing.

We tried to build a snowman but the snow was too powdery and it wouldn't compress into a snowball. So the girls just made a big pile of snow and a few snow angels.

And then in a random act of kindness, someone gave us their sled on the condition that we passed it on to another family when we were done.




The only bad thing about coming here for the snow is that after the kids are pooped and ready for hot chocolate, you have to walk back up this long, windy ramp (a good 125 yards). The whole time the girls were whining about being tired. We just kept enticing them with hot chocolate so that they would keep walking.

Overall, it was a lot of fun. We are hoping to go back again to the snow a few more times before the season is over. And with all the rain we have been having, I realize how good we usually have it here in LA.

The Unforgiven

The girls were driving us crazy this morning. Why do my kids pretend to not hear me? I know that the parenting books tell you to get down to their level and talk to them. But seriously, while I am getting their stuff together, getting dressed, changing Sam, and cleaning up, I am supposed to go over to where they are, get down on my knees and ask them in a normal voice, "Girls? We have to get going in a few minutes. Can you please get your shoes on?" Yeah, right. It is more like, "Get your shoes on now and don't make me tell you twice!"

And of course, when the kids are asking me for something, it is rapid-fire. "Can I have juice?" One second later..."Moooom, CAN I HAVE SOME JUICE?" One second later..."CAAAN III HAAAVE SOMMME JUUUICE!!!" Usually, within those five seconds, I am thinking, well, how much milk have they had today? Will it spoil their upcoming meal? Have they had other sweets today? But by the third time I have heard their demand, I get fed up and just say no...and quit whining, you're driving me crazy!

Anyhow, this morning the girls were misbehaving, Chang was sick so he got back into bed after taking care of the kids in the morning. I was trying to get them ready for a birthday party and it just was not happening. I got fed up and took away birthday cake from them. Because the cake wasn't right in front of them at the time, they were acting nonchalant. At the party however, when they couldn't have cake, they were no longer playing cool. Joey got mopey but understood that it was punishment for her own behavior. So though she was frowning, we talked, I told her I loved her and she accepted the situation. Elysha, on the other hand, was not having it. She was sitting on the couch at the party, very sullen and upset. I was talking to Joey and didn't notice initially. But then the mom of the birthday boy came up to me and asked if Elysha was okay. I looked over at her. Her arms were crossed so tightly that her hands practically met behind her back. Her lips were so pouty that she could have passed for an Asian Shiloh Jolie-Pitt. I tried to cuddle with her but nope, she was mad! After a few attempts to hold her, she walked away to find her sister with whom she could commiserate.

I promised the girls last night that we could make chocolate dipped strawberries so after their nap today, we made some. I think Elysha has forgiven me now.

So Happy Together

Chang and I will have been married seven years this year, come April. Our marriage is definitely stronger today than it was when we first got married. He is my rock, my best friend, the love of my life, and really just perfect for me in so many ways. He calls me Monica (as in Geller from Friends) because I can be uptight and control freaky about things, you know, every now and then.

Chang, on the other hand, seems like Mr. Easy-going, Cool as a Cucumber, all around decent guy. And he is, except when he is not.

Case in point, painting our living room. Every time we have moved, I have been pregnant or became pregnant shortly afterward. So I have not been able to help paint until now, and therefore I am a mere novice while Chang has elevated himself to the ranks of expert. I was eager to get the room painted, because I have a schedule in my head and come hell or highwater, we are sticking to the schedule, peoples!

Me: Honey, I am going to start taping the room while Sam naps so we can get things moving.
Expert: Mmm, I don't know. Taping is a very important task. You have to do it right.
What I hear: Don't even bother. You'll just do a sloppy job and I'll have to do it all over again, because only I can do it perfectly.
What I do: Ignore him and just start taping because I want to stick to my schedule.

Me: Honey, maybe I should start priming while Sam is napping.
Expert: Mmm, I don't know. Priming is a very important task. I'll do it.
What I hear: You don't even know how to use the roller and I don't think that I trust you painting when I am not home.
What I do: Start priming because I want to stick to my schedule.

Me: Honey, maybe I can start the second coat if this first coat dries soon.
Expert: No offense Honey but the second coat is very important. I'll do it.
What I hear: This is the final stage, what people are going to see. If I'm going to have my name on this job, it has to be perfect, like me.
What I do: Go to McDonalds at 10pm and get us some goodies. Then sit on the couch and eat my fries and sundae while watching Numb3rs (I love how they use math to help solve crime. So geeky and hot!).
Expert: Why don't you do the corners while I am doing the second coat?
What I hear: Wahh, wahh, wonk
What I do: Ignore him and keep eating my fries because we are ahead of schedule and fries don't taste good when they've cooled down.

But he redeemed himself by getting me a two-pound box of See's for Valentine's Day. He's a keeper.

Cashing in at PB

Remember the reason why I wanted to work at PB? It was so I could get furniture for the kids. But I also want to get new furniture for pretty much every room of the house. I am tired of the wood-ish furniture we have--purchased at bargain basement prices. Kmart, Ikea, furniture stores going out of business, stuff that we bought for Chang's mom but now she doesn't need. Our home looks like a thrift shop. People keep telling us to wait until the kids are older to get the good stuff. That was fine when people got married and had kids in their 20s. By the time they turned forty, they were marrying off their children. By the time we marry off our kids, Chang will be ready to retire. So I'm supposed to wait until our 60s? Um, I don't think so.

I was able to get a floor model of the exact couch I wanted and it is arriving next week. So now I am getting ready to paint the living room and decorate it. Yes, as in Martha Stewart decorate. I want to put in vases with fake flowers, inanimate objects with absolutely no function or purpose but just because I think it is purdy. And then I am going to build an invisible force field around the room so that if any of the kids even think about going into the room, they will be shocked, just mildly, of course. No milk stains, no crayon marks, no cheerios that roll itself underneath the couch or into the crevices of the cushions.

So I guess all the hours that I slave away for practically free at PB have been worth it after all.

The Uninvited

I've been sick since Friday but in denial until Sunday morning. Luckily, I was at my mom's so I just continued to sleep, even though everyone else woke up. After I ate a little breakfast, I went back into bed and slept a lot. It was wonderful to wake up to an empty house. The thought crossed my mind to take a shower but I just felt so weak.


After we got home last night, I started to feel gross but again, just wanted to get into bed. So today, I was smelling similar to the Survivor contestants but decided to sleep until the last possible moment. When Chang finally left to take the girls to school, I thought that I would wait until Sam naps before I would shower. However, even I couldn't take my own stench anymore. I turned on PBS kids for Sam and jumped into the shower, vowing to be as quick as possible. After I was already soaked, I realized I didn't leave the bathroom door open. Poor Sam, I thought. He is going to wander around the house, wringing his hands crying for me.


Thump!!! Suddenly, I saw this at the shower door:

And I looked like this:

Korean Men and Soju--Not a Good Combination

I was listening to NPR the other day and they mentioned the case of Yuon Bum Lee, a Hyundai executive who caused the death of a motorcyclist because he drove intoxicated. I think the reporter said that Lee supposedly had about 20 drinks and decided it would be a good idea to drive himself home. How stupid is that? Instead of owning up to what he did, he took off to Korea and vanished...until now.

I know that it is wrong, but I have this stereotype of Korean men, who drink ridiculous amounts of alcohol when they go out on company functions or you know, just a Tuesday night. In Korean custom, if someone offers you a drink, you have to drink it, plus you then pour a drink for the person who just offered you the drink. As you might guess, this custom can lend itself to many soju shots. This whole scene freaked me out enough that I never went to a Korean night club...or any club of any sorts.

At one of my many jobs, I worked at Stanford in the Registrar's department. My job was to ensure that graduate students met all their university requirements prior to receiving their degree, as well as take in their dissertations. I did this job for only a year but during my time there, I took in the dissertation of a Korean foreign student. His dissertation did not meet the university requirements but it was a quick fix so he was pretty much done...except that he wasn't. Even so, he went out drinking with his friends that weekend and was killed in a car accident because his friend was driving drunk. The registrar came up to me shortly after the accident and asked me to grant the student his PhD posthumously. It was a sad situation but I remember just feeling angry that he and his friends would make such a bad judgment call on their sobriety.

Chang doesn't drink and though sometimes I wish we could share a bottle of wine together every now and then, I really do like the fact that he doesn't drink...shattering the bad stereotype of Korean men that I have in my head from the stories I have heard, and the silly (and highly addictive) Korean dramas that I have watched. Okay, so none of my KA male friends really resemble this mental image I have, but when I hear stories like this of Yuon Bum Lee, it just reinforces it and it really irritates me.

Kisses for Mommy

These days I feel loved. Chang and I are happy together. Joey is in a mommy phase right now so she always wants me (sure it can be annoying but at the same time, it is nice to know that I haven't screwed her up so much that she wants nothing to do with me). Elysha goes hot and cold with both of us, though she is showing a preference for daddy these days. And Sam appears to have gone over to the dark side too. On the weekends, he loves Chang and wants to be held by daddy over mommy.

But at night time, Sam generally wants to be put down by me and I just revel in being able to hold him while I give him a bottle (yes I need to wean him but I have a ton of formula and bottle liners). Sam plays with his blankie, rolling it around his thumbs or drawing it over his eyes, and slowly drifts off to sleep. I like to hold him just a little bit longer than is necessary because these days, I feel like he is growing up too fast and I want him to stay my baby just a little bit longer (thus the bottle).

Anyhow, I had to work today because we were doing inventory at PB, and they needed all the able bodies they could get. I didn't come home until right before the kids' bedtime. When the kids saw me, they all ran to give me hugs and kisses. Usually Sam will run right into my arms and rest his head upon my shoulder. Today, he came up to me, and cuddled just a little bit. Then he looked up at me with his big black eyes and leaned in to give me a kiss. Then he cuddled and decided he had to give me another kiss...and then another. It was the cutest thing.